Two #GOONS collide as Ching Chang Chong finds himself in legal troubles with his local library. Oddly enough, he sought out the professional help of none other than Actual Blackface Lawyer himself, Nick Rekieta (AKA #LAWTISM). Apparently his Lawsplaining only lead to Chang admitting on camera tha...

The cult is tried for its many crimes against pizza by the Hon. Judge Pepperoni S. Parmeseano Esq.

I was contacted by the cousin of our #GOON Brian Alan Fortune and told that I need to pay Brian a cut from the Pizza Fund just for talking about him, or else keep his name out my mouth. Well that's never going to happen, so instead I am leaking the tv show pilot they created that is a complete Ti...

The ONLY awards show that celebrates teenage murderers and criminals. Host DJ Jizzy Piss hands out awards to the Most Beefer Teen, The Dan Schneider Podiatry Award, and the RE-BLOGGY to the most murderous teen who is STRAIGHT KILLIN' IT. Including Andrew David Wilson, the teen who shot and killed...

Maddox got his feed hijacked by Dick Masterson. Jesse made a bunch of stupid people angry with advertisements. Brian Alan Fortune's cousin wants fame and fortune. Someone in the cult is having a secret relationship.

Everyone on the internet apparently is a virgin with no job who lives in their mom's basement. The only more common insult is being "literally Hitler," and even he died in a basement. Obviously this can't be true of everyone, but there is one guy who fits every one of those stereotypes to a T, an...

Chloe Dykstra put out a scathing blind item article that clearly called out podcaster, television host, and all-around-complete-dork Chris Hardwick as being a sexual abuser. He briefly got #MeToo'd out of several jobs, but now, two months later, he is being welcomed back to the mainstream. Jesse ...

I'm so sick of doing literally anything.

Alex Jones and InfoWars have been deplatformed by THE GLOBALISTS on the internet, and for some reason Maddox doesn't have a problem with it. Jesse engages him in the Worst Debate in the Universe to try to bring Maddox back to reason. Who wins? Maddox and the Globalists, or Jesse and Freedom? You ...

Some Australian dude put another clunker comedy special on Netflix called "Nanette," that is supposedly very IMPORTANT comedy. While all the usual culprits say it's "game-changing," Jesse only hears bad things, so he decides to see just how cringeworthy it is. SPOILER ALERT: Lesbian.

I have to get out of here.

Finally.

Jesse unboxes his new package, the WORST book on Amazon. It was written by our #Unspooling #Goon, The Spiritual Smartass, back when he was pretending to be a #PUA. Jesse attempts reading the poorly written pamphlet, uncovers Brandon's scheme to make it a bestseller, and plays a dramatic reading o...

The only prank call game show. Items suggested: -Air Conditioner-Self Help Books-Rascal Scooter-Defibrillator Plus a tale of ex-girlfriends and cunt roommates.

This was nearly 8 hours. Don't fucking ask me what happened in it. All I remember is near the end we turned Drake's dad working at Best buy into all of the Batman characters.

Jesse issues a sincere apology to the #incels of the #HAPA community on reddit. He had no idea they were so insecure, and just how deeply his words would affect them. He reads their cries of pain and backlash from his video. PLUS: #Goon Trevor Yau, the mental rapper, reappears.Join the FACEBOOK C...

RYAN KATSU RIVERA is here! Hapas are Asian/white halfbreeds that have all the vitriol of a white supremacist, and all the penis of an Asian man. Their entire existence is questioning why Asian women hook up with dopey white dudes instead of them, the supreme gentlemen. They are bigger #incels tha...

I got a new drone and I already broke it.

Brandon Marshall Havener, The Spiritual Smartass, is a life coach with a bit of a problem. He's being bullied by the PIRANHAS. Who life coaches the life coach? What is a man to do when his world falls apart? Brandon's answer is to start UNSPOOLING and spill his spaghetti al over the internet. Bes...